Feelings of the Mom of a Deployed Soldier!

I am not really sure that I can put the feelings into words. Being over-whelmed with emotions of fear, anxiety, stress and pride are just a few of the emotions that you experience for months prior to the deployment date. The fear of the unknown has always been my biggest fear. A different type of anxiety and stress are now a regular part of your daily life. It's not something you have any control over but you somehow have to learn to live with. The pride I feel for what he is doing makes my heart swell and my eyes tear. You learn to live in faith and prayer becomes your second language. Some days you pray more than others but your faith never waivers. You find yourself praying while doing your chores, you realize you just missed half the movie you were watching or you can't remember what you just read because you started thinking about your child and immediately start praying for his safety and for his brothers in arms. It seems like the only thing that can hold your concentration is your soldier. I have written before of how I get angry over comments or remarks made about our troops but then I have to get myself in check and remember that one of the reasons our troops do what they do is so we can have freedom of speech even though we don't always like what some people have to say. When your soldier is deployed you are never far away from the phone or the internet because you don't want to miss any opportunity to hear from him. You go into panic mode when you hear of bombing in the area where your soldier is. Once you finally hear from your soldier you breath a sign of relief and you hold on to every word. You find yourself scouring the internet hoping for just a glimpse of your soldier. Sleep is not something that comes easily. I think the best rest I have had since January was the 2 weeks he was home on R&R. You become very friendly with your post master because you are in there more than ever before. Holidays aren't the same. It doesn't matter how many care packages you send or what the contents are you never feel like you are doing enough. Being the mother (parent) of a Soldier is a like being on an emotional roller coaster ride. Proud to be a Soldiers Mom!